welcome to children 101

self esteem

about children 101
mental health issues facing children
Mental Health: in the womb & the first year of life....
Mental Health: Two, Three & Four for more!
Mental Health: The Elementary School Child
Mental Health: The Chaos Begins - Almost Teens...
Emotions & Feelings
Just Love 'Em - What Children Need
Children & Fear
children & anger
Children & Control
Power Struggles
learning to communicate...it's a 2 way street!
Setting Limits & Boundaries
self esteem
Dealing with a bully
Character & Values
Social Skills
Children & Friendships
Children Need Extended Family Relationships
Lifestyle Factors
Children & Responsibilities
About School & Education
Sex Education
Spirituality & Children
Gifted Children
Children with Special Needs
Children with Special Problems
children with special gifts
Children & Stress
Child Abuse & Neglect
Dysfunctional Family Life
Children & Divorce
Parenting Tips
An Adoption in the Family
Single Parenting
Same Sex Parenting
Step Families
Foster Families
No Kids? Be A Mentor!
When Kids Self Medicate
When A Parent Dies
When A Sibling Dies
Children & Trauma
coping mechanisms for kids
teaching life skills

welcome to the emotional feelings network of sites

A not for profit network of self-help websites.

Welcome! I hope I can help you find what you're looking for! Anytime you see an underlined word in a different color you're being offered an opportunity to learn more than what you came here for. It's important to understand the true meanings of your emotions and feelings as well as many other topics that are within this network. This entire network is set up to help those who want to help themselves find a sense of peace in their lives - discover who resides within and recover from whatever life has dealt you. Clicking on the underlined link words will open a new window so whatever page you began on will remain waiting for you to get back to it!


If you can't find what you're looking for here, scroll down to see an entire menu of what is offered within the emotional feelings network of sites! 



do you have children or transport children?

click here... it's an emotional feeling "you tube video" that'll cause you to be more careful in how you transport your child(ren).

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click the link to go to nurture 101!

There's a new site in the network! I am almost finished completing each page, but I can't wait anymore to tell you all about it! Please pay it a visit soon! It's an important topic!


nuture 101

Click here to send me an e-mail! I'd love to hear from you with any questions, suggestions, comments, ventings or sharings! You could also just say hello!
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I do appreciate you so much!

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Health Tip: Building Your Child's Self-esteem

Help her feel good about herself

(HealthDay News) -- Proper self-esteem can help your children make healthier decisions and avoid negative pressures. Children with good self-esteem also have an easier time dealing with problems and conflicts, the Nemours Foundation says. 

Here are the foundation's suggestions for building self-esteem in your child:

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The following information was found at www.coping.org! It's a fantastic site and I highly recommend you go there to see it all for yourself. You may find some very useful information!
click here to visit the source page now!

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Parenting Tips for Activating Children's Self-esteem over the Life-span

Encouraging Self-esteem over the Life-span

Pathfinders need to be conscious of the developmental parenting tasks which they need to do for their children. These need to be accomplished over children's life-span in order for them to acquire a sense of personal responsibility & self-esteem.

These tasks are divided into categories by specific stages in children's lives. Children differ from one another & it's important to understand that these developmental parenting tasks are being presented here with the acknowledgment that not all children will be able to accept certain tasks until a later stage or may need & be ready to accept them in an earlier stage.

The important point being, parents need to accomplish these parenting tasks in order to insure children develop a sense of self-esteem, personal responsibility taking & productive lifestyles. It's also important that parents recognize that there are some tasks which need to be continuously provided in every developmental stage in children's lives.

What follows is the Pathfinders list of developmental parenting tasks necessary to activate self-esteem in children.

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Parenting Pathfinders' Tasks Over the Life Span

1.0     Conception

Parenting Pathfinders make sure that the child is being conceived:

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Parenting Pathfinders make sure that during the pregnancy the child is being:

  • Provided a healthy womb environment

  • Provided adequate nourishment in the womb

  • Monitored & attended to by medical professionals with both parents' participation

  • A shared event by two loving, excited & caring parents

  • Spoken to & touched by both parents while in the womb

  • Provided an emotionally sound & stress-free womb

  • Prepared for by both parents working together to set up space in the house for the new arrival

  • Anticipated by both parents who are jointly learning about & exercising for the birthing process

  • Cared for to insure a full term birth

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Parenting Pathfinders attempt to make sure that the birth of the child is one where:

  • Labor & delivery is a shared parental experience which has been previously dress rehearsed

  • Labor & delivery is an event in which steps have been taken to avoid surprises or medical crises for both parents & child if possible

  • It's a result of a medically healthy delivery

  • There are good APGAR scores & normal birth weight

  • Child is at full gestational age

  • It's a welcomed, joyful & greatly relished event for both parents

  • It's a welcomed, joyful & greatly celebrated arrival into the extended families of both parents

  • All costs of pregnancy, labor, delivery & nursery stay are pre-paid or covered by date of birth, so that no large medical bills remain once child comes home

  • It's followed by arrival to the home, which is fully prepared & waiting for new family member

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Birth to 2 years

Parenting Pathfinders make sure that the infant experiences the following:

  • Welcomed & accepted into new family by all siblings & other extended family members in home

  • Sibling rivalry exhibited by older siblings, addressed & handled in a healthy way

  • Self awareness of self, body & needs encouraged

  • Healthy & harmonious relationships with others reinforced as important skill to acquire

  • Identification as self as different from others encouraged

  • Characteristics which account for differences between people pointed out

  • Accurate identification of body parts & other identifying characteristics encouraged

  • Read to & surrounded in an envelope of verbal sounds to encourage expressing verbally & non-verbally, wants & needs

  • Receive verbal & non-verbal messages of recognition & positive acceptance

  • Allowed to express feelings openly & taught words & gestures to assist in their expression

  • Limits set in a babyproofed home as to where exploration & free play are allowed

  • Harmonious relationships between parents & other family members exhibited

  • Adequate physical touch provided to give warmth, acceptance & cared for messages

  • Adequate mutual emotional attachment between child & both parents

  • Experience of unconditional love from both parents

  • Sense of security & trust developed between child & both parents

  • Emotional intimacy & closeness established between child & both parents

  • Development of a sense of belonging in family

  • Development of sense of being wanted in family

  • Establishment of bonding with parents & family

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2 to 5 years

Parenting Pathfinders encourage the preschool age child to experience the following:

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5 to 11 years

Parenting Pathfinders encourage the elementary school aged child to experience the following:

  • Identification with peer group

  • Achievement of optimal potential

  • Intrinsic motivation to succeed at school

  • Sense of security in presentation of self to others

  • Sense of altruism and service to others

  • Acceptance of individual sexuality and difference between sexes

  • Ability to share reasonably well with others

  • Enforcement of respect for others

  • Compliance with social norms, rules and regulations

  • Openness in communicating of feelings

  • Participation in and leading family meetings

  • Realization that sexual stereotypes are poor determinants for roles individuals take in society

  • Acceptance of physical changes in body soon to take place

  • Acceptance of warm hugs, physical affection and caring

  • Acceptance of personal role in family, peer group, school and community

  • Acceptance of responsibilities expected at home, school and other outside activities

  • Conflict resolution, sibling rivalry reduction and mutual cooperation in family

  • Recognition as being a person capable of determining own future in life

  • Career mindedness

  • Appropriate information on realities of world issues and problems to develop a sense of personal place in world

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11 to 21 years

Parenting Pathfinders encourage the pre-adolescent, adolescent & young adult child to experience the following:

  • Acceptance, understanding & recognition of autonomy seeking behaviors

  • Support & guidance on how to resolve interpersonal conflicts in relationships

  • Independence of action within responsible guidelines encouraged

  • Acceptance & open discussion of responsible sexuality

  • Accomplishment of career oriented educational experiences

  • Entrance into world of real work to gain insight into meeting personal survival needs

  • Acceptance & open discussion of personal sexuality, sexual identity & sexual orientation

  • Entrance into career oriented academic & training with clarity of intended career goal

  • Adoption of healthy lifestyle to promote personal physical & mental health

  • Taking charge of own physical & mental health promotion

  • Promotion of personal self-esteem by responsible living

  • Capability to be honest with self & others in assessment of personal skills, abilities, competencies & talents

  • Ability to openly explore personal problems, concerns & worries with helpers to resolve resulting emotional unbalance

  • Responsible attitudes, beliefs & behaviors displayed in terms of experimentation with alcohol, smoking & drugs

  • Responsible sexual behaviors with others

  • Ability to take over personal nutritional planning & balanced diet control

  • Ability to recognize stressors in life & how to overcome them

  • Recognition of the appropriate use of recreational & leisure activities in life

  • Ability to be a Pathfinder & teach others about responsible living based on personal experience

  • Willingness to take personal responsibility for own life without manipulating or hooking others to take over

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21 years & on

Parenting Pathfinders encourage their adult children to display the following:

The Parenting Pathfinder's parenting tasks are only effective in enhancing children's development if they are performed by parents. Parenting Pathfinders recognize that it is parental actions, role-modeling, and handling of children which have direct impact on their responsibility taking and self-esteem.

There is no definitive delineation of a stage when a certain task must be accomplished. However each task must be accomplished by parents at some time in children's lives. Each task once accomplished must be sustained over the remaining life span if it will have a positive impact.

The tasks of parents in the adulthood stage are all aimed at encouraging adult children to exhibit behaviors on their own. The goal being complete independence from and non-enmeshment with their parents. Knowing developmental parental tasks helps parents gauge what is currently not accomplished by them with their children so that remedial or proactive actions can be instituted.

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Parenting Pathfinders' Task Assessment

Directions: For each of your children review the Parenting Pathfinder'sTasks which cover each child's life span up to present age & chronological stage.

Use a different colored ink to respond for each child. Put a plus in front of those tasks which you've accomplished for each child at least 75% of the time.

Put a minus for each task which you haven't accomplished at least 75% of the time.

The minus designated tasks are then in need of either your remedial attention if they're in a stage of life preceding the child's current one or your proactive attention if they're in the child's current chronological stage.

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Journal Exercise

Directions: In your personal journal respond to the following questions:

1. What is your impression of the Parenting Pathfinder's Tasks list?

How realistic is it?

How idealistic?

2. When you were putting minuses in for your children in stages of their life that have long since past, how did you feel?

What can be done to make up for those tasks which were not accomplished in earlier life?

What do you need to do to change this?

3. When you were putting minuses in for your children in their current chronological age stage, how did you feel?

What do you need to do to insure these tasks are met?

Do you have the tools to assist your children accomplish these tasks?

What more do you need to accomplish them?

4. In reviewing your results with your partner's, how much did you agree or disagree?

What impact will this have on future parenting?

How easy will it be to agree on a joint plan of action to remediate non-accomplished tasks and facilitate tasks needing to be accomplished?

5. How much guilt or shame is generated by reviewing these tasks for children's self-esteem and personal responsibility taking?

What do you plan to do with this guilt?

How will resolving this guilt assist your children accomplish the tasks to develop into healthy adults?

6. If your children are adopted or step children, how did reviewing these tasks affect your understanding, compassion, and empathy for their current functioning in your family?

What remedial steps need to be taken to help them experience parenting tasks which their natural parents did not achieve with them?

7. Children don't ask to be born into this world.

How significant do you believe the conception, pregnancy and birth stages are in children's self-esteem development?

What drives your beliefs in this matter?

8. How comfortable are you with the development of children who are independent from their parents?

How comfortable are you with them solving their own problems and not turning to their own parents to rescue, fix, or take care of them when they are adults?

9. What has reviewing these parenting tasks told you about your Pathfinder role with your children?

What Pathfinding Principles do you still need to implement in your life to enable you to complete these parenting tasks with your children?

10. How will your home life change as a result of using these tasks as outlines for encouraging your children's self-esteem?

How comfortable will your partner be with these changes?

How do you think your children will respond to them?

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Off the Internet

Wooden Bowl 

(based on a story by Tolstoy)

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, and four-year-old grandson. The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered. The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather's shaky hands and failing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor. When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess. "We must do something about Grandfather," said the son. "I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.........!!"

So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner. There grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner. Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl. When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes they saw a tear in  his eye as he sat alone. Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitions when he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence..........Then; One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing with wood scraps on the floor. He asked the child sweetly, "What are you making?" Just as sweetly,  the boy responded, "Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food in when I grow up." The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.

The words so struck the parents that they were speechless. No word was spoken but tears streamed down their cheeks and both knew what must be done. That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led him back to the family table. For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason, neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.

Children are remarkably perceptive. Their eyes ever observe, their ears ever listen, and their minds ever process the messages they absorb. Remember the saying "Children are like sponges, they absorb everything and anything that is put in front of  them.

Where Does Self Esteem Come From?
by Gary Robertson
And why not? Self esteem equates to confidence, being attractive (without having to fake it), and being a magnet for success, wealth, popularity, and a whole host of other goodies. The Law Of Attraction requires a genuine core of self esteem before it swings into action, bringing whatever we desire to us without our having to lift a finger. We don't have to earn what comes to us when we have lots of self esteem. It comes to us as a cosmic gift.

But if we don't already have that core, can we generate it by positive thinking? Not really! Positive thinking flows from self esteem, not the other way around. And it doesn't come from carefully tending our mental garden plot either, any more than weeding, fertilizing and watering makes our favorite plants grow. We can weed out all our negative thinking and still not see the flowers grow.
Why not? Because the seed has to have already been planted. And that's the part most of the RA RA programs out there don't understand, therefore fail to produce the desired result.

So where does the seed of self esteem come from? Connection. We all experienced connection before we were born. We didn't know what it was, but it fed us, removed waste products, and nurtured us from single cell to viable fetus. After our umbilical connection was severed, we continued to have emotional and mental connection to our human providers for at least a couple of years. That's how mommy knew what to do when we couldn't say an intelligible word.

So an even better analogy than tending seeds would be a hose connection. Self esteem is the natural experience of having connection to unlimited sources for whatever we need, whether it be emotional support (aka unconditional love), mental guidance, and spiritual abundance. Shaking the hose may be great fun - and even produce a few sprays of water on occasion - but the hose bib has to be connected and turned on before there is much volume.

What happened to most of us is that we never had a quality of connection that was sustainable. Or it didn't provide enough healthy nutrients for our seeds of esteem to take root and grow strong and healthy on their own.

How can we tell if we have viable connection? Take this simple YES TEST. Can you say yes to three simple statements?

I have enough! (without taking anything from anyone else)
I am enough! (on my own, without connecting to anyone else)
The universe is enough! (everyone has enough without anyone lacking what they need)

If we cannot affirm these statements whole heartedly, without qualification or condition, then our connection isn't complete and fully functional. Which explains why so many of us are trying out so many different kinds of strategies designed to make connection:
with love partners, soul mates, family ties, children, pets, food, products of every kind designed to fool everyone that we are worth more, when deep down we know we are not.
And that's just on the human level. How about all the spiritual and religious pathways to connect with a divine source of plenty? Who doesn't have one or more practice that's geared toward appeasing, enticing, or demanding that the cosmos supply us with more of what we want?

Think about it? How many of the above mentioned things are you doing every day? Or perhaps only on Sabbath - and hoping that Divine Grace stays with you through the following Saturday night.

No wonder there are so many pathways back to Oneness with the ultimate source of everything. Only problem with that scenario is that once having made that one-way trip down the birth canal, it is mighty difficult to climb back into the womb!

Many of the unhealthy behaviors we see in ourselves and others around us are attempts to derive what we need from objects, companions, family, and close relationships. That's like trying to get enough water second hand from them, rather than finding a spigot that supplies clean water for ourselves.

What we need instead is a viable method of making connection with unlimited supply at a spiritual level. A cosmic hose bib, as it were. We need to realize that many of the avenues available to us, whether codified religious systems or new age spirituality, extract a high price and deliver often contaminated supply.
And we need connection to ourselves, as well. Few of us can say we know our innermost hearts - who we are as individualized spiritual beings as well as unique human beings. One of the main distractions for knowing ourselves are the people - real or televised - attempting to tell us to be someone else. Look different. Do something different. Live our lives in generic ways suitable to the purposes of someone else.

It's only when we have viable connection internally and to the creative power of the universe that we have enough flowing to us. Only then do we have that sense of being filled up that we commonly call self esteem. When we are full, we cannot not be valuable. Who can say we aren't valuable when universal sources demonstrate that we are?
For more on this and related topics, take a look at

Author's Bio
Gary Robertson is author of DO I HAFTA GROW UP, THE ADULT GUIDE TO UNFINISHED BUSINESS OF CHILDHOOD. Find out more at http://doihaftagrowup.com

As director of Springs Foundation, a non-profit organization, he designed a program called Growing Bones that allows clients to reclaim missing elements of their developmental foundation and become truly grown up. Springs Foundation offers healing methods based in Energy Psychology and Energy Medicine. Visit HTTP://springsfoundation.org for more information.
source site: www.selfgrowth.com

How to Develop Self-Esteem in Children
By J. Bailey Molineux, Ph.D.
There are two goals that all parents should have for their children. The first is self-esteem, the sense that one is a lovable, worthwhile individual. Without it, a person cannot find satisfaction in life or relationships, especially marriages.

The second is a sense of morality, the courage to do what is morally right and refrain from doing what is morally wrong. If most parents do not instill this in their children, we would not be able to function as a civilized society.

Eugene Anderson, ED.D., George Redman, Ph.D. and Charlotte Rogers, Ph.D. in their book, "Self-Esteem for Tots to Teens" (Parenting and Teaching Publications, 1991), describe five principles for developing self-esteemin children and adolescents. The first is to acknowledge and listen to their thoughts and emotions since they are so much a part of who they are. Listening to you offspring with empathy says you care about what they think and feel. Plus it will create an atmosphere in which they will be more willing to listen to you.

You don't always have to agree with your kids when you listen to them, nor let them do whatever they want. You can have a different view on a situation and still understand their perspective. And you may still have to discipline them even if you better understand why they misbehaved.

The second principle, which should be self-evident, is to structure situations so your children experience more success than failure. Don't expect standards of performance which they cannot achieve. You want them to grow up with far more praise than criticism, more accomplishments than failures.

Third, give your children some degree of control over their lives. When they are younger, they can choose what clothes to wear, for example, as long as they are appropriate for the weather. Or what breakfast cereal to choose. When older, they can choose what courses to take in high school or what college to attend.

Too much control sends the message that your children can't adequately handle their lives. Too little control sends the message you don't care, so you must strike a balance between these two extremes and give them more freedom as they grow older.

Fourth, let your children know they are lovable and capable. Again, this is a self-evident principle. You should give your children daily expressions of affection - hugs, kisses, words of love, praise and appreciation. Think of them as cups of love which you want to fill with as much caring as you can.

Finally, model good self-esteem yourself. To me, this is one of the more important principles since you can't give to your children what you don't grant to yourself: self-love. Research is clear that high self-esteem parents have high self-esteem kids whereas parents who are low in self-esteem have kids who are low in self-esteem also.

There are no guarantees that if you follow these principles your children will grow up to feel good about themselves since there are factors in self-esteem development over which you have little control - their physical attractiveness, peer relations, intellectual abilities or athletic abilities, as examples. But I can guarantee they'll have a poorer chance of developing good self-esteem if you don't follow these principles. After all, your unconditional love and support is the most important ingredient in their mental health.

Author's Bio: About the Author: J. Bailey Molineux, a psychologist with Adult & Child Counseling, has incorporated many of his articles in a book, Loving Isn't Easy, Isbn 1587410419, sold thru bookstores everywhere or available directly from http://selfhelpbooks.com. Copyright 2002, J. Bailey Molineux & http://selfhelpbooks.com, all rights reserved. This article may be reprinted but must include authors copyright & website hyperlinks.
source site: click here

5 Easy Things To Do With Your Child To Build Self-Esteem
By Michelle Rossi
Look around and you'll see that low self-esteem is becoming an epidemic! Raising your child's self-esteem takes time, but here's 5 quick ways to help them become more socially and academically involved.

1. Write down 10 positive words. Have your child recite each one back to you, then have them think of ways that each word represents them.

2. Help your child write out 3 goals that they would like to accomplish this school year.

3. Create an art project with them using an 8X10 picture frame, inside have them cut out pictures of family, friends, pets, and anything that makes them happy. Make that be the first thing they see when they wake up in the morning. That will put a smile on their face.

4. Place yourself in their shoes. You'll find communicating with them becomes much more active.

5. Ask your child questions such as: How was your day? Did you learn anything new in school today? Who did you sit with during lunch?

These are five wonderful ways to help build your child's self-esteem, positive thinking and confidence. Anytime a child accomplishes a goal, their self-esteem soars!

Michelle Rossi Author/CEO All About Me Program for Today's Youth.

Author's Bio: Michelle Rossi, (White) is a graduate from Oakland University, Rochester, Michigan. She has earned her Bachelor of Science Degree in Elementary Education & a Michigan Teaching Certificate. She is the founder/CEO of the All About Me Program that is being utilized throughout many communities. The program is geared to teach today's youth how to build self-esteem, positive thinking, understand the creative mind, communicate better, learn about personality, friendships & how to set goals. Michelle's workbook All About Me, is the instructional tool used in the program which has been reviewed by Mort Crim & other news media. Michelle's workbook & program is by far helping today's youth grow socially & academically stronger.

Michelle has been published in Chicken Soup for the Kid's Soul 2. Her story is called, "Start With The Truth." She has also been published in Chicken Soup for the Child's Soul. Her story is called, "Who's to Blame?" Chicken Soup for the American Idol Soul has published her story, "The Youngest Idol Fan."

source site: click here

Children and Self-Esteem 

Self-esteem is the value we place on ourselves. It is the feeling we have about all the things we see ourselves to be. It is the knowledge that we are lovable, we are capable, and we are unique. Good self-esteem means:

  • having a healthy view of yourself,
  • having a quiet sense of self-worth,
  • having a positive outlook,
  • feeling satisfied with yourself most of the time,
  • setting realistic goals.

Both adults and children benefit from good relationships, experiences and positive thinking. Many of the steps necessary for building a child's self-esteem will also help you in developing and maintaining your own.

As a parent, you have the greatest influence in shaping your children's sense of self-worth; you are their first and most important teacher. Their self-esteem is further influenced as they develop relationships with other family members, school teachers, friends and other adults.

Love and acceptance

Showing children that they are loved and accepted simply because they exist is the first and most important step to building a healthy self-esteem. Children need to get the message that they are worthy of love (even if they behave badly sometimes) from the most important adults in their lives - their parents, You must remember to:

  • give love with no strings attached,
  • show love and acceptance through your daily expressions of affection, care and concern,
  • spend time together - play, work and relax together,
  • show that you feel good about them by hugging them,
  • tell them often, "I like what you did/said" and "I love you."

A sense of belonging

Children need to know that they are important. When they feel accepted and loved by the important people in their lives, they feel comfortable, safe and secure, and open to communication. If children feel respected and secure within a family, they will find it easier to make friendships outside the family. To help children develop that sense of belonging, you can:

  • help them build valuable family and community relationships,
  • encourage pride in their family's ethnic background and heritage,
  • keep reminders of family events and family history around the home (photograph albums, home videos, etc.).

Security and safety

Children must have their basic needs met if they are to feel safe and comfortable. A sense of security and safety allows them to take the next step: to try new things and to learn about themselves.

When children feel safe, they are less likely to be afraid of failure and more likely to risk trying again when they fail. Through this process, they are able to experience success. As their parent, you should try to:

  • provide a safe physical environment,
  • set and enforce clear rules and limits,
  • be realistic in your expectations,
  • encourage them to say "No" to negative pressures.


A stable environment they can depend on provides children with a sense of security. It is important for children to learn that their actions have consequences. Knowing that you can be relied upon to be consistent and to give help when necessary helps children to think, "I can trust you, and I can trust myself." To build this kind of trust, you should:

  • be consistent so they know what to expect,
  • be sure your verbal and non-verbal messages agree,
  • be honest about your feelings to yourself and to the children,
  • treat each child fairly.


Children will develop respect for themselves and for others if they learn that what they think, feel and do is important. If you put them down or call them demeaning names, your children will feel unworthy. Criticism or punishment which is too harsh will prevent children from developing self-confidence. By accepting your children's right to have feelings, you can help them learn to respect the feelings of others. If you teach your children healthy ways to express their feelings, they will learn to develop positive relationships. When dealing with your children, you should remember to:

  • accept what they are feeling even if it is different from your own feelings,
  • show respect for their feelings, beliefs, actions and individuality by listening with sincere interest,
  • make "I feel" or "I believe", rather than "You are", statements when you do have to tell children what they are doing is wrong.

Feeling special

We are all special. It is important for you to help your children discover their own special talents and qualities. Once they do identify what makes them special, they need to learn to value their own strengths. Remember to teach your children that feeling special does not mean feeling better than others; rather, it is a positive understanding of their own uniqueness. You should encourage children to:

  • value their uniqueness,
  • be optimistic,
  • have a cheerful attitude (remember to set a good example),
  • try things their own way,
  • understand that trying your best is more important than winning.


It is extremely important to give children support and approval. Children who have faith and confidence in themselves and their abilities will be more likely to lead happy and productive adult lives. Teach your children to learn from their mistakes, to work towards a goal, and to have pride in their successes. You should:

  • encourage them to face challenges and take risks,
  • teach them to make decisions and to set goals,
  • express faith and confidence in them and their capabilities,
  • provide opportunities for them to take responsibility for their actions,
  • help them recognize that there are things they must accept and things they can choose to change,
  • give them an opportunity to succeed.

Do you need more information?

There are many books written for teachers, health professionals and parents, that provide information and ideas on helping to build children's self-esteem. You can also contact a local community organization, such as the Canadian Mental Health Association, to find out about workshops and other programs available in your community.

source site: click here


click here!

Click here to visit the Red Cross page that allows you to access your local chapter of the Red Cross by entering your zip code in the specified box, to see how you can help in your area. You can also call your local Red Cross Chapter that you can find the number for online or in your local phone book to volunteer for any openings that may need to be filled or you can find another way to help others there as well!

you've been visiting children 101
please have a great day & take a few minutes to explore some of the other sites in the emotional feelings network of sites! explore the unresolved emotions & feelings that may be the cause of some of your pain & hurt... be curious & open to new possibilities! thanks again for visiting at anxieties 102!
anxieties 101 - click here!
anxieties 102 - click here!
almost 30 sites, all designed, editted & maintained by kathleen!
until next time: consider yourself hugged by a friend today!
til' next time! kathleen
this is simply an informational website concerning emotions & feelings. it does not advise anyone to perform methods -treatments - practice described within, endorse methods described anywhere within or advise any visitor with medical or psychological treatment that should be considered only thru a medical doctor, medical professional, or mental health professional.  in no way are we a medical professional or mental health professional.