you've found your way to children 101 within the
emotional feelings network of sites.
kathleen
Welcome to Children 101!
Today
raising children is one of the most difficult responsibilities facing parents and families. With so much new information about the emotional and physical
development of children, how can parents be expected to keep up with everything?
Here at Children 101, it's convenient for you to pay a quick visit to the site to find information concerning
a question you may be needing an answer to.
Check out the resources below that
may have brought you here to begin with and find the opportunities to encourage your children to experience optimal emotional and physical well being through your parenting efforts!
Feel free to email me anytime concerning this website with questions,
comments or just to say hello!
If you'd like to see the essence of childhood, click here to visit youtube.com's video - The Cutest Kid Ever. No Really.
I've opened a great new site that all parents need to visit. Nurture101 has some very good information for everyone, not just parents!
the anxieties 101 network of sites
Attention All Parents Please!
Welcome to Children
101 - just one important website that's part of the entire whole 28 sites in the emotional feelings network
of sites! If you have concerns regarding your child, it may be why you're here! If it's your parenting skills you're trying
to locate information on, you may end up here as well! Or - you may have found yourself here thru the underlined link
words method, because you are interested in the process of "attachment" or to learn about your child's mental health!
No matter what you're reason is for being here; they're all good reasons I'm quite positive!
- The single most important factor I would like for you to remember when you leave here, I ask that you do some super in depth
soul searching to see if what I am asking of you is reasonable!
Our children are the earth's most important resource. What becomes of our Mother Earth is what we allow
to be leftover from our generations stay on this planet! We all need to learn how to conserve energy, get educated on recycling
& global warming, and other environmental issues.
We must take the time to take part in what are the most essential responsibilites we all own as
human beings!
Another concern here is that of our children. Living in today's society there are many things that chidlren
need to be protected from. As their parents, it is our responsibility to keep them safe. Children also need to be educated.
It's been a gradual decline, subtle, and very hard to recognize until we take just a few seconds out of our day to think,
"Why are our children so out of control these days?"
Part of this dilemma remains parental responsibility that isn't being attended to. It's a parents' job to
discipline their children, teach them moral values and character traits. A parent must meet all the needs of their
child(ren). Emotional needs are often left unattended because children aren't born with an instruction manual!
Unfortunately, we have an entire generation - Generation X - coming up as the young adults
of today that have been raised without having their emotional needs met. This and the needs of the current generation
of children is a huge problem that needs to be addressed! Whereas the baby boomers have been busy, "finding themselves," in
recovery and personal growth programs - we have also been busy "making right," the mistakes we found that we'd made in
our parenting efforts.
Re-establishing an emotional relationship with our children, realizing our mistakes and actually apologizing
to our young adult children, and most of all - validating their unmet needs - seems to be important work that is being done
in large numbers by the world's largest generation so far! The baby boomers are huge! They're eagerly learning what their
parents didn't know what to teach them about emotional needs and how to meet them.
I urge all parents that come to this site to begin to study the educational system in your town or city.
Begin to get involved in governmental controls over your child's education. Work in harmony as a volunteer with your child's
school system to ensure quality education in both academic studies and the meeting of your child's emotional needs in
a social situation!
Write letters to our government, go to local city meetings and communicate to your school principal that
you're fed up with the ways teachers are treating your students. With the percentages of bullies out there injuring your
child(ren)'s self esteem - added to the lack of awareness concerning emotional needs among our educators - it's almost a guarantee
that your child is being mortally injured at school every day and you as a parent are amiss in your parental protection of
them!
Study throughout the site and I guarantee that you will become more and more aware of what has to be done
immediately to save not only our children and our society, but our Mother Earth as well!
kathleen
En Espanol!
Many of the articles posted on this website are from source sites
that offer their articles in Espanol!
At the bottom of each page are the source sites listed with a link to
the site. If the article is available En Espanol - you'll see a link to click on for that article! at the source site!
I believe & work very hard to offer this special
feature within all of the emotional feelings network of sites webpages because I also believe with all my heart that all of you are special
as well.
When you read thru the articles, definitions or quotations
- you'll see the underlined link words (all emotion & feeling words, as well as other specifically pertinent to recovery & personal growth words) that are offered for you to delve
even further into the meaning of the information being displayed.
The reason I believe this so important for you in recovery from many dysfunctions or personal growth efforts is that often we can't make progress until we allow ourselves to be open to all possibilities & allow ourselves to develop a sense of curiosity.
When you click on the underlined link words
- a new window will always open - leaving you with the original window of information that you began with. You don't have
to delete your original window, just minimize it until you have looked over your new & additional information concerning
the emotion or feeling underlined link word you clicked on.
There are also underlined link words for additional resources offered
to you as in:
It's in the News... article titles you can click on that will open in a
new browser window as well - that are pertinent & up to date with information concerning the emotion or feeling word featured on the page
Very Important Additional Resources....article titles or website addresses for additional resource information that's very valuable - no need to search the web on a search engine - these sites are pertinent & timely in their presentations
Article & Book Titles within an article.... you'll find article links
for articles copyrighted & not posted at the authors request, but too valuable to leave out, additional referred to articles as posted by the author of the article
& links to websites that the author refers to within the articles.
feature #2: the
emotional feelings network of sites
Throughout the 5 years I've been working on these sites, the information base has grown immensely. I found that personally, while my research
began with learning about mental illness, I progressed in my personal growth & recovery until I realized that it was essential that I work on my unresolved feelings & emotions - learning to identify what
I have been feeling & not dealing with throughout my life - to begin to resolve dysfunctional events in my life.
in beginning to study emotions & feelings I found
that so many emotions & feelings were intertwined with each other that I began to have to add more emotions & feelings
to my original "one" emotional feelings site.
then I discovered as well that our unresolved emotions
& feelings are directly tied into our mental illnesses, dysfunctional thinking, false or misguided beliefs, eating disorders,
lifestyle habits, etc. until I realized that the only possible option was to include a network of sites that would link everything
together.
this is another reason why the underlined link word
system is so important. the underlined link words will take you throughout a network of sites that pertain to many important
subjects.
see the index of sites included within the emotional feelings network of sites directly over in the right hand column!
feature #3: special word definitions!
some authors use some pretty strange words in their articles,
so i highlight words that may be difficult to understand with the color pink! the definition is then included at the bottom
of that page!
feature #4:
at the bottom of each page there is a link to
the site where the articles displayed on each page came from, unless, of course, i have accessed that information somewhere
& an unknown source was listed.
feature # 5: some articles by yours truly!
you'll find the notation, "personal note:" or sometimes just an article with my
name, "kathleen," or "kathleen howe" as the author. i try to write on each homepage an article entitled, "i just gotta say it!" all participation by yours truly
is totally dependent on how much time i have available for it...
Recently, I've heard several
different well known media outlets ring out the call challenging the public to join their programs for a "new and healthier you!" It's tempting. All those who are not happy with their self
image, their physical appearance or well being - letting out the slightest sigh, gasp, cough, clearing their throats
just enough to wipe out the words that might have rolled off of their tongues to proclaim, "Yeah! That's me! I'll join!" It's
just too difficult. It takes too much time. It's too expensive to get into shape and healthier. Besides, those fruits and
veggies are getting more expensive everyday just like the cost of the gasoline that must be purchased to get them to our neighborhood
produce counters. Yeah... that's one of the better excuses.
The nightly news has been a reliable sounding board for those of us who
are depressed, but are fighting off the possibilities of giving in to being mentally disabled. With our
world full of doom and gloom, high gas prices as well as notorious politicians slandering each other how do sane people
stay sane today? News of more dead Americans in Iraq, Al Qaida, other terrorist regimes and jobs lost in America. More
companies taking their jobs to third world countries to increase their profit margins while the American public goes on unemployment,
beer and then suicide watch. I'd like to know who will be left in America with a paycheck to buy a car in a few years.
The government has allowed companies like General Motors to renege on their promised pensions. People that worked thirty plus
years for them are scurrying around for part time jobs. Thirty plus years in a factory - that's depressing.
The children come home from school to find mother and/or father with worried
expressions. They're afraid to say anything to their parents so they run into the safety of their bedrooms immediately upon
entering their homes. Why would they be afraid when they have so much to say? Why wouldn't they feel safe enough to tell their
parents that they've been bullied all day by teachers who wring their hands hopelessly throughout their anxiety ridden day?
Inner city schools being the worst, wonder why they must practice lock down situations when a knife, a gun or a stranger decides
to visit their schools once a week. The kids who are paying attention are discouraged when the ghetto kids steal their pens
and pencils and then stare them down to see if they'll say something.
It's more important for a kid to "look" right today than to get an education
of any kind. Oh, it's always been like that, peer pressure! you'll chime in - but today - students, mostly girl students - vulnerable
teenage souls are happy to give up their virginity, their dignity and their moral standards to "look" like they might have
sex with a boy. They don't want to shine from within, it's too dangerous. A teacher will take them down in a swift second;
discouraging them from speaking the truth or what's right - it might be catching and things would get out of control. They
might have to control the classroom and that's usually impossible.
It's much easier to be the adult bully and beat down the kids who have
a brain they'd like to use than to teach a class full of kids who don't want to learn. I spoke to my own teenage daughter
yesterday about not liking boys who treat her badly. She said to me, "You don't understand!" and I laughed to myself. I was
a teenager once. I know what it's like and then I used my brain for a while to do some deeper thinking. I established some
sound reasoning as to why I don't understand and it worried me. How could my daughter expect to protect herself from boys
who want to abuse her when her coaches and teachers get away with it all day. They already took the "fight" out of her sails.
She gave up thinking that Martin Luther King actually meant something. "Why celebrate Martin Luther King Day?" my own daughter
chimed in this past year. It's happening now to the whites. Her coach, a black substitute teacher wanna-be-coach can't speak
proper English. He speaks in terms the team can understand, like from "the hood."
The principal, a distinguished looking black man; didn't she say he had
a warrant out for his arrest for not paying child support? They both beat her down this past year because she was the captain
of the basketball team last year when 95% of the girls that played were white. They never won a game all season, but they
sure had spirit. This year was different. The coach played the same three or four black girls every single game whether they
attended practice or not. The rules changed when they couldn't afford to buy nice clothes for away game days. Suddenly jeans
were okay. I had already spent my grocery money on new clothes that all of a sudden couldn't be worn because the heel on my
daughter's shoe was too sharp. She was told someone might use her shoe as a weapon. She had to wear flats although it wasn't
in the dress code.
The teachers threatened everyday that if the students didn't get "with
it," they'd have to talk to the basketball coach. Just because the girls were on the basketball team didn't mean that they
could talk in class, or not turn in a piece of homework. The teachers, just grown up bullies, discouraged my daughter from
creative writing this year because she's just stupid to think she might be able to do it correctly. I closed my eyes as I
continued to think - digging down deep - to see if I could understand where my daughter was coming from. She had been impossible
to be with because she was so distraught over a guy who had told her to, "Stay the 'f' away from him!" and called her a stalker.
Suddenly I felt inadequate as a parent.
Suddenly I wanted to
pull my thirteen year old daughter up into my arms and hold her like she was an infant and tell her, "Let's start life
over again for you..." but I knew it was impossible.
Suddenly my own words began to
ring back to me over and over in my mind, "It's not a fairy tale world we're living in!"
This time it was Rachel
saying those words to me, just the other day when I told her that she was such a "good girl."
She wanted to know
what was so "good" about her. She was so upset that this boy wasn't talking to her that
day. He had called her, "a bitch," "a slut," and I was wringing my hands with worry over her. She loves this guy, she says.
I had the conversation with her, "Do you know what love is Rachel?" She said that love didn't matter anymore. She said I didn't
understand her anyway. She went running to her room when I got frustrated and didn't know what else to say to her. As she
left the room she screamed to me, "And you told me you would talk to me about anything!"
I just couldn't take it for one more minute. I didn't know
what else to say to her because she was valid in her thinking. Her world sucks. She told me how unhappy she is and asked me
why she should try when no one at school cares whether or not she does well or not. I had talked to her for hours and hours
about her potential as a young woman in today's world. I have always talked to her about positive thinking and good self esteem.
I swore that I wouldn't make the same mistakes my parents did with me. But when it all comes down to it... it's not the,
"let's get a healthy body!" commercial I need to hear! It's a "let's get a healthy mind
America!" commercial that would help me right now.
So parents... what's happening in your
households? Are you just keeping your kids so busy with activities and sports that they don't have time to be depressed?
Are they so overwhelmed with activities, homework, eating and sleeping that there's no time for thinking about who they are
or who they will be? I think that there's also danger in that approach. There's no balance. We need balance.
Do you have time to hear how your children are
feeling? Do you know what to do with that information? Do you know what it feels like to feel, "defeated?" How about "hopeless?" do you understand what that feels like? Are you aware that your children are being bullied at school by grown up bullies disguised as teachers,
coaches and principals? Did you know that the mental health counselor at school doesn't have time to go to the bathroom because
so many kids want to talk to her everyday? We grew up without school counselors - didn't we? We weren't supposed to need anyone
like that. They weren't in the budget anyway; oh... we cut out art and music so we could have a mental health counselor...
I get it now!
My son, who is in the 10th grade has been failing
for a few years. He's not really a full fledged 10th grader because he still needs 2 freshman credits to be a 10th grader
- but he's already failed those courses for the second time... he used to be a straight A student. He was commended
for his drawing skills, being recognized by the Wright Patterson Air Force's Art Contest Board as first for his grade with
his poster of "Space Travel of the Future." He got a ribbon and a gift certificate to spend in their gift shop. His work was
displayed, as was his sister's poster who achieved, "honorable mention."
I'll display his poem below after I ask him for
another copy of it. He's a great writer as well. He is refusing to stay in school. I just enrolled him into an "at home" electronic
school program. He will work at his own pace and if he needs help he can go to the center and work with a teacher. I've met
one of their teachers and she seemed very nice. He says he can't get any respect at his present school. The teachers call
him a failure and have always told him he'll never make it in today's world. They called him a dreamer. They told him that
his priorities weren't in order. But they also called him, "stupid," "no good for anything," "a jerk," and although his behavior
has never been a problem - " a waste of their time."
Since he hasn't had to go to school every day this past
week while we wait for his computer to be installed, free of charge, your tax dollars at work - he's been helpful around
the house. He cut down a tree for my husband, he's mowed the yard and helped me with cleaning the basement without being asked
to help. He's energized instead of sitting in his room playing guitar hero. He's hopeful. My husband bought him a lawn mower
of his own so he can mow lawns and not ruin his new mower this year! He has already applied for a job and collected some other
applications. He's been talking to me about what he wants to do and what his plans are. He has asked me to help him be organized.
Where are we and what are we thinking - parents of today? I
was corresponding with a young man in Israel via e-mail. He had been to my emotional feelings websites and he was depressed
and lonely. I corresponded with him for over a year. He was just beginning to attend university there. His first few weeks
at school there was a strike and so... no classes. He had performed his service duty there before going to university. He
had worked with disabled people. He was strong of heart, compassionate and sensitive, but he had a deep pit of emptiness inside
of him. He was desperately lonely. He wanted to feel love and happiness. He wanted to be respected. It wasn't much to ask
for.
This past January I received an e-mail from his
sister saying that my friend had died. I couldn't believe it, but because he lived in Israel where we see so much violence
on the nightly news, I was often afraid that he would be hurt or killed in a suicide bombing of a bus or something. But that
wasn't the case this time. For some reason, my friend, at 19 years old - was on the third floor of a building that was
falling apart. His bicycle was parked down below. For some reason he had fallen the three stories and had not been able to
survive his injuries. While he was alive for a few days; he didn't survive it. I was never so sad. I had never felt so disconsolate.
I am still reeling from the shock of it all.
I copied his e-mails from my "saved folder" because
I had saved every one of them to send to his family. They didn't know what to think about it all. I corresponded with his
father as well as his sister and watched their words carefully. When the opportunity appeared as I had hoped it would, I took
advantage of it. His father had made a statement that "my friend had chosen to do what he did." I wrote back immediately,
my stomach churning, my pulse quickening - did he think that he committed suicide? His father's return e-mail just encouraged
me to think more about his son's frame of mind through our correspondences to see what I could see from it all.
I found an e-mail. Somewhere around six months
before he had died that said, "Today I felt like I wanted to die." Neither of us had talked about it much. I think that I
said I knew how he felt because I had days like that too. I want to think that my friend would never do that. He was so loved
by so many. But he was lonely, desperately lonely in his own world. I didn't realize how lonely he was until I thought - why
else would an 18 or 19 year old boy correspond for over a year with a 50 year old woman on the other side of the world - almost
daily? He wasn't so lonely when we talked.
So, it's not President Bush's fault. It's happening everywhere in this world to
every kind of young person. There's teen, children and young adults feeling defeated, hopeless and LONELY. And they come from
good families, and bad families. I was watching "Ellen" yesterday, on Earth Day. There was a gentleman on her show talking
about seratonin levels of people who received an act of kindness. He spoke about how the levels of this "feel good" amino
acid in our brains also rose when we were the perpetrators of an act of kindness. He even made the point that those who were
watching this act of kindness being performed had a higher level of seratonin. Amazing, isn't it?
We're all beaten down and it's time we got our
minds healthy as well as our bodies. If we took a "healthy mind" focus first it might be easier to get that healthy body.
Look at how popular Dr. Phil has been. Isn't it just a bit strange that it's not the Maury Povich or Jerry Springer show because
it's us... middle class or upper middle class people who are dysfunctional and crazed he has been trying to fix. He's talking
about working on their minds first, but no one is listening. No wonder the "Ellen" show is so popular! She has that "feel
good" thing happening all throughout her show! It's awesome to be able to feel good after watching television! She has those
random acts of kindness everywhere around her and it feels good to watch her show!
Let's begin getting our minds straight for our kids'
sakes parents. Begin to figure it all out for yourself and find out that it begins with a random act of kindness towards
a stranger. Even getting "green" begins with a random act of kindness to our planet. It feels good to be "green." That's why
it's so popular. If we all just do what feels good instead of what feels so bad... like our kids... perhaps we could be good
role models for them and teach them respect, kindness and perhaps they wouldn't be so lonely.
The Layer Down Under at one time, was
included in the spare space on each site and consists of additional information that wasn't accessible thru our navigational
menu on the left hand side of each page. The Layer Down Under is a source of information concerning the tools that
you'll need to "dig in deep" while exploring your emotions & feelings.
I named it The Layer Down Under because as you'll soon discover, if you haven't already, that there
are layers & layers of unresolved emotions & feelings buried deep within each of us.
To get down beneath the very first layer of them
all, you need to learn some additional information that will help you understand how to resolve those old hurts, raw
open & sore emotions that have been underlying everything you have done in your life.
Discover one emotion & be sure that it's secondary to the original or another emotion that's above the original
emotion experienced during your traumas. That's the way it works.... Just peel back the layers down under to learn more &
more buried information.
Subjects covered in The
Layer Down Under....
Addictions - Drug & Alcohol Abuse, Gambling, Smoking, and more... Becoming addicted to something is a negative coping
mechanism that we use to keep us from feeling the pain we have inside us...
We all have beliefs.
Most of our belief systems were formed when we were children living in a dysfunctional world... often times learned from our parents who were
dysfunctional themselves....
I myself have lived w/an eating disorder for most of my life, "night eating syndrome." Professionals
aren't quite sure what to do with this disorder yet. Although it was discovered in the 1950's, professionals haven't
studied much about it.... I believe that my negative body image sold me on eating at night for comfort among other things....
Read more about what people are facing these days w/their own body image issues....
Change isn't easy. We all get used to doing things a certain way & although we may know
it's not the "best" way for us that we do these things... it's so hard to accept that we have to change. Acceptance is the
first detail to work on when we're talking about changing ourselves....
This page is just about emotions, not one in particular, but about how we deal with our emotions, the importance of
emotions, what happens to our emotions if we don't feel them & end up stuffing them - also about kids & their emotions
as well as teens!
The same goes
for this "feelings page." About feelings generally, why we experience feelings, what we do with them, what we don't do with
them that we should as well as other general information concerning feelings... it's an interesting page!
While professionals & experts, well - you know - those educated people, maybe like you,
are out their in their worlds of business, finance, and other mainstays of our modern world, there seems to be an elemnet
of doubt concerning some of the subjects contained in The Layer Down Under...
Like... how important is it for us to look for insightful information in our every day lives?...
After being raised by well educated parents who didn't know anything about "insight" I can rightfully say that most people
are letting their educations get in the way of this important factor that they're missing out on in their educated lives....
that's right, i said it.... don't be too educated to miss out on concentrating on the insightful information you may be missing
in your daily life, this page talks about that abit!
Another blessing
often passed by is the gift of inspiration. How open are you to allowing yourself to be touched by an inspiring message? How
hard do some of you work to look the other way, saying, "this is crap...." instead of pondering on what could be a very inspiring
message?
This is an interesting topic that I've wanted to cover from the beginning of my website ventures.... you could
say,
"I've had the intention
of covering this topic since the beginning of the emotional feelings network, perhaps because it hits so close to home (being a personal interest) that I've procrastinated a bit about it." Just what do your intentions
say about you as an individual? How come many of us fall short on fulfilling our good intentions? An interesting topic - are
you willing to ask yourself some important questions?
Do you hold any
stock whatsoever in what your intuition tells you?
Maybe you should check out this page to find out the importance of
being open & present enough to rely on your intuition for making important decisions.
After we discover that underneath our anger with life there's an open wound left behind from abandonment, abuse or
some other dysfunction in our past, how willing are you to sit and feel that unresolved emotion or feeling, so you can "let
go" of it & settle that account out of your life? Don't know how? This page lends some insight on that topic.
This is one of my personal vices.... I admit it.
I'm not a good listener at times, especially when it comes to my husband. I sure want him to listen to me though. The times
do happen though, when I can keep my mouth shut long enough to soak in just what he's trying to tell me, and believe me....
it's usually a very insightful experience. It's amazing what we can learn about others as well as ourselves when we choose
to keep our mouths shut and empathetically listen to someone.
Another faux pas of the educated community, is ignoring
the fact that most of us are not living "in the present' moment to allow ourselves to be mindful. It's how we solve some of
our most difficult blockages, by being mindful of what is happening around us, by what we encounter along the journey of self
growth. Let yourself become mindful - it takes practice, but well worth the effort.
This
is a subject that I have had trouble finding information on believe it or not.... Opinions are everywhere, available to us
everyday whether we want to listen to them or not! I like opinions. I am curious as to why people believe the way they do!
I like to ask some questions after I hear peoples' opinions & try to understand just why they think the way they do. Hoping
to learn something from someone's elses belief system is an interesting opportunity. How curious are you about someone elses'
opinions? Can you say you even care how anyone else thinks?
Are you always thinking ahead or behind? Many of us are stuck in a rut of a very common avoidance behavior that involves
us being preoccupied with what we have experienced in the past, which hinders our growing in the present moment, or always
thinking ahead as to what we want to do in our future. taking the time to be "present" in your life allows you to use some
of the tools you'll find in The Layer Down Under, to be happier in your life & make some important changes.
That's right,
how clear is your mirrorof opportunity? Do you take the time
to reflect on anything? Does your behavior reflect a certain behavior you're stuck in? Do you even want to go there? Be real
with yourself, letting your authentic self be known. Take time to reflect on important subjects, be open, mindful & in
the present moment to reflect on just who you are as a person.
Risk Taking ...How Vulnerable will you allow yourself to be? Pretty good question, isn't it?
Life can be extremely hurtful to us at times.
I rely on the wisdom of a great book when I think about taking risks.... it's a book that I read when I was a teenager,
it seemed to be all the craze back then, but it's wisdom is eternal... the author, kahlil gibran in the book - The Prophet
- offers such gems as "how can you know joy if you haven't experienced sorrow?" that's what risk taking is about.... allowing
yourself to be open, maybe to sorrow, but what can you learn from that sorrow is my question to you.... what can you learn
from letting down your defensive outer shell & learning to take some risks?
Self Esteem....
if only my parents had known about this... how different would I be today? I ask myself.... it's the
topic of the moment it seems.... just how much importance do you put into your self esteem? are you just ignoring the craze?
it's not one... it's really an important topic... get where you want to be by learning more about your self esteem on this
page... now located at
the website - "the self pages" !!!
Another topic that puts us to the test... are you letting your education stand in the way of being open to spirituality?
What do you hold sacred in your belief system? I struggle with this one as well.... 12 steppers are all about their "Higher
Power,"
Christians are all about their "God"... Muslims, Jews, Buddhists are all about who they hold sacred in their beliefs
as well... what do you truly believe?.... do you think that spirituality is only about religion? Take some time to consider
your sense of spirituality in your life...
Now we know that
we can be stressed even in the womb. What about that? Geez o Pete! It's amazing what research can tell us these days about
stress... learn more about keeping stress out of your life here....
Not Dinnertime conversation for us baby boomers - that's for sure...
For us it was always the line from our parents,
"Because that's what I said!" or "Because that's the way it is!" Well for us as adults, we have to examine how we think,
especially us "boomers." What we believed is most likely, not so, and how we think, is most likely slightly mixed up.... can you be real enough with yourself to really examine & maybe even change how you think
about things?
the 3 newest pages at the layer down under!
boundaries....: something we need to learn about for healthier relationships!
how miserable is your life because your expectations
never seem to come to fruition? perhaps we need to evaluate those expectations or get rid of them all together!
humor.... how many people do you wish had a better sense of humor?
how about yourself? did you forget that you were supposed to have one?
&....if that's not enough for you to take in....
you'll have the opportunity, if you're willing &
searching hard enough...
to visit the layer down under that! another wealth of information concerning recovery, and those deep down buried issues that you
have found once you've been in recovery for awhile. This site also serves the other sites in the
emotional feelings network of sites as a "continued pages" option so that all the information collected for you - can
be included.
the e-mail connection!
send me an e-mail anytime!
if you have questions, suggestions or just want to say "hey!"
i recently found the article below, which i feel explains the reason why i urge visitors to
email me. i believe this concept to be very true, it's helped me enormously in dealing with some of my unresolved emotions
& feelings concerning my own personal traumas.
i also believe it answers the question that so many people have,
"why is this negative experience happening to me?"
A chapter from "You Are the Grandest Love of All - God In Human Form" by UnityLove at Counselor of the Heart.com. Copyright 2004.
Each experience we have either shows us Who We Are ... or who we are not.
Experiences help us better define Who We Are & they show us the way to making grander choices. Experiences bring great insight along with a wealth of information about ourselves.
Our experiences become our guidance ... & remind us to return to Love in every way.
Let's address
our perceptions regarding the bad or negative situations that have happened in our lives. Many of us are ashamed of some of these experiences & beat ourselves up continually because of them.
We're going to shed a new light in how we can view these experiences in a different way. Below are explanations that
we may not have considered before & could be of great assistance in helping us "understand ourselves better".
Did
we know that one way we find out Who We Really Are ... is by experiencing who we are not?
All experiences
gift us with information … they give us the ability to compare what served us grandly & what didn't.
Are we aware … that our life up to this point in time, along
with all our experiences & difficulties ... have now become our credentials?
Have we realized
that the experiences we perceived as bad in our past, but have risen above & overcome the challenges in … prepared us to become a teacher to others who are going thru the very same things we did?
These experiences could be of rape, depression, alcoholism, drugs or almost anything. Are we noticing that certain people show up in our life, just because we went thru those
experiences & can truly help them now?
Have we stopped to think … that this could be all part of a Master Plan going
on behind the scenes of life?
It's past time we address the guilt & unworthiness we carry within ourselves ... for it's keeping us from
our grandest action ... Loving ourselves.
Loving ourselves is the key to our Divinity. Loveopens us to the wonder we carry within us. It allows all our dreams to come true.
We're going to address the things that we've done in our past that seem
so uncomfortable for us to bear. These are things we've put ourselves down about, beat ourselves up for, made ourselves miserable over & make ourselves less by, each minute we think about them.
There was a Divine Reason for those
experiences … Love sees it ... do you?
It's much easier to define God in terms of what God isn't ... than it
is to define God in terms of what God is. Think about this dear one, there's great wisdom in this statement.
This defining process applies to us as well.
It
becomes easier for us to define ... Who We Truly Are & would like to be ... when we re-evaluate the experiences that showed
us who we aren't.
This gives us a much clearer picture of what we don't want to express next time. It's
at that moment of feeling unhappy ... that we become aware. We gain a much clearer picture of what not to choose again.
Many times the wiser answer comes easily thru this negative experience because it just happens to be the opposite of what we chose to begin with. These particular
experiences guide us in seeing how to change our choices for the better in the future. They show the way to a grander choice of what we'd really like to
express.
Without these experiences stored within us acting as a reminder ... we'd keep repeating
the same patterns over & over.
When we've had experiences in which we didn't seem to express our best
... it becomes important to realize "what" those experiences really did do for us. These experiences left a bad taste in our mouth &
perhaps made us feel bad for they didn't work out the way we desired.
Their job was to show us ... how to make grander choices for our future ... & our job was to notice what we were being shown.
Therefore, experiencing who we are not, isn't a bad thing ... but a door-opening event to help us understand who we really would like to be. The only reason we feel bad is because we haven't realized the grandeur in it all.
These experiences are actually Divine ... for contained within them is
a wonderful gift. The gift is "choice." When we make a grander choice than we did before, our new choice brings
about change.
Change becomes the chisel ... that rounds off the rough edges
of an unsculpted piece of art ... bringing it to its true & final beauty.
Dear one ... You
aren't only the piece of art being sculpted ... but you're the sculptor!
A negative or bad experience helps us define what we didn't like &
weren't happy with. It helps us "find" something much grander within ourselves that we might not have considered before. It
helps us realize there were different choices available to us … the choices that would have brought what we liked & what would have made us happy in that particular life situation.
These experiences happened for a reason. If we're wise, we'll make a record of what happened
... & use it to our advantage.
Once we realize what we don't want ... we open to a whole different range of choices … that can help us feel & experience better next time.
For
how can we call forth God Expression in Human Form ... if we can't define what it is?
We encounter these
negativefeelings & experiences to notice there's a grander choice of Love, a better way of feeling & a more beautiful expression awaiting us.
In the case of guilt & unworthiness ... there's a grander choice of Love for ourselves awaiting us.
Each time we choose Love in any expression ... we step more fully into our Divinity. The Divine Plan works in many ways to bring us into
our grandness.
So understand, dear one ... even our negative experiences show us the way ... to God Expression in our human form.
As we carry these
past experiences & memories around within us, instead of feeling bad about them ... we need to thank them for what they've really done for us.
They're there to help remind
us not to repeat those situations again ... & they also show us the way to a better expression.
The
negativefeelings we get from these experiences assist us in making grander choices the next time around … so we'll feel better. Each time they rise within us, they remind us not to repeat that particular action, situation or experience in the same
manner we did before ... if we want to be happy, that is.
Negative reminders call out to us saying, "Hey don't forget we learned this before!"
When we take heed
... we are Re-born ... a new us arises. And it's all because of the awareness we now hold … due to our past actions & our negative experiences.
So it's time to stop beating yourself up & putting yourself down.
It's way past time to Love yourself & hold a higher consciousness & understanding for your own sake, dear one.
Become gentler to yourself. Allow yourself to have had those experiences
... for they hold much wisdom in what not to do again. You've gone thru something. You've learned something. You now see new & grander choices.
All
these type of things that you hold & walk around with aren't there to torment you ... but they're there to remind you
of ... "who you are not" & of the choices not to make again. Negative experiences are not your cross to carry ... they're your Angels holding the Light so you can see clearly in
a similar darkened situation.
It's all about finding the Love in a particular situation that challenges us. Love "was the reason" these experiences were presented to us to begin with.
In fact many of life's situations are presented exclusively to see if we can
find the Love. Finding Love for ourselves is one of our hardest challenges. When we find the Love & Love ourselves again ... that particular experience & lesson ends.
Do we know
why? Because we now know how to hold the Love being called for … even in the hardest of times. Do we not see it's all a Divine Plan to get us
to our grandest human expression yet? That is, of course, if we don't use those experiences against ourselves.
In any experience in our life all we need to do is find the Love in the experience … along with finding the Love for whomever is involved in it. We're dealt many hands in life ... some of them are pretty drastic &
really tough.
Our challenge is to always find the Love, in every situation & experience we're involved in. And most of all it's in finding the Love for ourselves … no matter what we've done.
When we find the Love ... we feel the Love ... we experience the Love ... & others experience the Love coming from us.
We're here on this planet ... to find, hold & express the Love We Truly Are, no matter what's going on in our life, or around us.
The way we become
aware & understand the Love That We Are ... is by going thru all those experiences of who we are not.
Negative experiences help us stand on guard ... so we don't repeat the same situation over & over. It's the negative experiences that project us right into Who We Are. It's Love coming as a helpful friend to remind us.
Find the silver lining in any bad experience & we go past the illusion of anything being bad … into the grand awareness & wisdom hidden as a gift in that particular experience. And it's in this way that negative experiences show us the way to what will serve us grandly in our next experience. This is the
way to happiness & feeling good as we go thru every situation in our lives. It's in the realization that the negative experience … wasn't really bad at all.
How ournegativeexperiences ... open the doors for us to help others. When we go to
help another but we haven't had that particular experience ourselves ... the one looking for help listens to us in a certain way. But after we explain to this individual that we've gone thru the very same experience
as he or she has ... something unique happens in the way this person listens to us from then on.
The door to their heart opens in the most beautiful of ways ... because this person comes to realize we truly do understand ... their feelings, their hurt, their pain ... & their all of it.
To this individual, you become a
genuine teacher... because you also experienced this first hand & survived it.
You're able to truly guide this person in how to feel better & make grander choices in their life because of your experience in common. Isn't it wonderful how it works?
We
first come to know Who We Are … & then we're given the gift of helping others see ... & step into Who They
Are.
So the next time you can't find one good thing about a certain experience in your life ask yourself
...
Have I stopped & realized the wisdom, knowledge, clarity, strength & understanding I truly gained from that experience?
Do I now see a clearer path to the choices that would have better served
me better & what qualities I need to call on … for who I want to be & express next time?
Do I see how this experience also held a gift in "sculpting me into a
teacher" with much wisdom to share … so I can truly be of service to those that come to me who are having a similar experience?
One special note …
Anegative or bad experience is all in the eye of the beholder. It all boils down to the perspective one holds &
how they see the situation.
It's
our perception that determines if the experience will be held as a positive or negative one. Anything we experience can be looked at in several ways … but know that anything held in a
negative way can be looked at positively. It all depends on if we use the mind alone … or if we bring our heart into it as well.
Our
challenge is to find the Love, goodness & silver lining ... in every experience no matter how tough it was or may be.
I'd
like to share an experience from my life that really shook me up. It is given to help you fully understand a perspective of Love & how things work behind the scenes for our greater good.
Throughout my life I
was presented with many experiences that were geared to get me to speak up for myself. Every time an experience showed up
in my life to get me to do this, I failed to stand up for myself & then more experiences were presented.
The reason the experiences kept coming was … I hadn't found enough
Love for myself to honor myself.
At age 15 my boyfriend raped me. Still very much a child, I wasn't ready
for a sexual encounter mentally or emotionally. I cried the whole time the rape was happening … but I didn't take any
other actions to make him stop.
I didn't speak up or stand up for myself nor did I protect myself or show resistance in any way. I thought the boy should have known better ... I thought he definitely could see me crying & would know this wasn't appropriate.
As crazy as it sounds, I stayed with him for years & any sexual contact we had was like experiencing the rape over & over again.
Every time it happened, I was given another chance to Love myself enough to say what I felt in my heart & walk out. This was all happening because of my refusal to
think enough of myself.
I could have put an end to what was happening at any time. All I had to
do was take a stand & hold my own ground. But my silent loveless pattern continued & so did the experiences.
After a traumatic event with this boy, two officers took an hour &
a half out of their day to explain the facts of life & Love to me … & because of them, I finally woke up.
I didn't realize this at the
time I was experiencing it, but looking back, I now fully understand why it all had happened. Many times in my life, I was presented
with experiences to speak up for myself … which I chose over & over not to do for various reasons.
Divine Love was asking me … How tough do things have to become before you stand up for yourself?
How many uncomfortable experiences must be sent … for you to awaken to Loving yourself?
How long will you wait before you finally honor yourself?
After many attempts of trying to get me to see & do this for myself
... the Divine Plan took me into one of my hardest lessons in life. It was presented out of Pure Love to help me awaken to one of the most important things in life … Loving myself.
The reason for the experience was to find enough Love for myself to say … "No". This is "not acceptable" & walk out no matter what anyone else thought or wanted. It was all about me finally finding the Love I needed for myself, the Love that I'd been missing the whole time.
Now as I look back ... I no longer see
this as a negative experience. I realize it was all to bring me back to the Love I should have been holding for myself all along. The boy was but a character in my life that came to
push me beyond my loveless boundaries. His role was to challenge me more than any other situation before … so I would finally come to honor myself & say "No".
The experience was all Divinely Created ... so I'd
finally say & do what I needed to for myself & find the Love I so desperatelyneeded as well.
When we come to understand that every experience we have... is but to find the
Love or gift hidden in it ... it all gets pretty simple. Understanding brings great wisdom. Wisdom is Love. Love is Wisdom.
The more you understand that these experiences were but a way for you to see "how
to shine next time" ... the more you'll begin to Love yourself again.
You've been gathering what you need ... for the grandest human walk you've ever taken ... your grandest human expression ever ... for you're being
sculpted to Express God in Human Form.
Would God not Love Itself, honor Itself & Its Temple in every way?
All is well
...it always was. Once you finally
take the time to Love yourself enough, you'll show Love beyond compare in any situation, no matter what's happening in your life. This is one of the ways life
works behind the scenes to help you become all you can be.
It has all been a plan for you to stand
in All Your Glory & Shine like you never have before. It's time to see yourself in a new light thru the eyes of Love.
Stop putting yourself down & hurting yourself. Rise to Who You Really Are & realize the "gift" you truly received from all those experiences.
You've waited so long to be Loved & approved of, dear one … allow yourself the pleasures & rewards of Loving & "honoring yourself".
Remember, You Are that Piece of Art being Sculpted ... Sculpt Yourself Divine!
From: "You Are the Grandest Love of All - God In Human Form" by UnityLove, Copyright 2004 click here for website
Are you as a parent perpetuating favoritism with your children?
Posted Thursday, May 14, 2009 1:14
PM
My
Second-Favorite Son: A Dad's Tale of Parental Favoritism
Newsweek
By Eric Weinberg
My son Benjamin is three and a half. He’s an unbelievably
sweet, smart, Spider-Man-obsessed kid who wakes up smiling, and goes to bed asking me to lie next to him in the dark and tell
him the story I made up about a monster who uses lemons and oranges and cherries and grapes and blueberries to make giant
rainbows in the sky. (And sure, it occurs to me now that I’ve been sending my son to bed every night dreaming
of an artistically-inclined gay super-icon, but there’s really no way to put that genie back in the bottle.) We’re
not religious people, but I think I can speak for my wife, Hilary, and I when I say we feel really blessed to have Ben.
So, that said, I want to talk about my second favorite son, Julian.
Just so you understand,
I say “second favorite” only because I don’t love Julian as much as I love Ben. And I say “son”
because he’s not a daughter, which is what I really, really wanted. Badly. And I say “my” because
I stubbornly choose to believe I helped produce him, despite the fact that he’s almost a year and a half old and resembles
me about as much as a slice of cheesecake resembles Jeff Goldblum.
When I say I don’t love Julian as much as Benjamin, I’m
really saying I don’t know him as well: He’s younger, his personality isn’t as well formed, we haven’t
spent nearly as much time together. Plus, his head looks like a lightbulb. To be fair, it’s not like the
day Ben was born I loved him as much as I do now; I mean, I’m not crazy, or his mom. Point being, if I’m
throwing a party, Ben gets an invite before Julian.
But back to how Julian’s the wrong sex and probably not
mine: See, whenever I thought about having children, I imagined a boy and a girl; it just seemed normal to me.
For instance, I’m a boy and my sister’s a girl. And, sure enough, Hilary’s second pregnancy felt different
than her first one. Hil and I had this great idea—well, copied this great idea—of having our doctor reveal
the sex of our baby to us on a card, which we’d open over a romantic dinner. (Our romantic dinner was eaten at
home, half-standing at the kitchen island while we went through junk mail, but I’m not saying that’s mandatory.)
Anyway, we opened the card to make it official, and it said, “Congratulations—it’s a boy!” And,
just like that, all the air left my body. Not in a farty way; I mean I was devastated. We had a boy, we had a
great boy, what did we need another boy for?
Now, I’m no psychiatrist, but I am Jewish. So I’ve
obsessed over this long enough to know that my desire for a baby girl probably goes back to me feeling a tad screwed-over
by my older sister while I was growing up. (For the record, we’re friends now, which I hope is encouraging to
eight-year-olds everywhere.) As a kid it made me wish I had a younger sister, who I’d be far nicer to, and as an adult
it made me wish I could have a little girl of my own to cuddle, to counsel, to connect with in the way that other fathers
– my best friends, in fact – do with their daughters, just as mothers do with their sons. See, people always
talk about that special relationship between a father and daughter; what they hardly ever talk about is that special relationship
between a father and someone else’s daughter. And, sure, I get that it’s no one’s idea of a classic
May-December romance, but there’s a certain bond you have with someone whom you’ve known since she pronounced
that word “Dethember.”
Of course, when Hil was actually giving birth to Julian, all
I was thinking was, Just be healthy. And maybe have a vagina. Not in addition to a penis, because… anyway,
just be healthy. And he was healthy. He looked nothing like me, but I blew right past that until I had to tell
the doctor my blood type, and he said, “Well, either you’re wrong, or he’s not your child.”
I blew past that, too, and as the weeks and months went by, I kept waiting for something, anything, familiar to show up in
my second son. Instead, he just kept looking like some odd combination of my wife and… someone too ugly for her
to have slept with. “Maybe you should get a blood test,” Hilary would joke with me. And we laugh,
awkwardly. Friends trotted out something like, “He really has your, um… expressions,” because it’s
a nice thing to say, like, “I love your house,” or “I didn’t realize you were that old.”
Yet, oddly, over time, I’ve grown accustomed to Julian’s face. Sometime last year I said, “Hey, handsome,”
and then he and I both did a double take when we realized I wasn’t being sarcastic.
So, the upshot is, I have two boys. The Weinberg boys.
As in, “Mom, can the Weinberg boys come over?” Or, “No arrests have been made, but local police are
questioning the Weinberg boys about their parents’ disappearance.” And the thing is, Julian is such a boy:
He grabs fistfuls of hair out of your scalp, he gashes himself over his eye and doesn’t blink. And whereas when
you pull Ben’s hair back he almost has a pretty girl’s face, when you pull Julian’s hair back he just kind
of looks like… well, suppose Andy Richter had chemo.
The truth is, love comes in all sorts of ways. With Julian,
well… I don’t want to brag, but he pursued me. Big time. He made me fall completely in love with him.
And it’s not just a crush, it’s the real thing, I can feel it.
Excerpted from "The Other One," by Eric
Weinberg. Weinberg is just one of several very funny - and honest - writers sharing true stores and parental confessions in
"Afterbirth: Stories You Won’t Read in Parenting Magazines," edited by Dani Klein Modisett (St. Martin’s Press,
2009).
Do Children Commit Suicide? Yes, but sometimes it seems like an accident. By Christopher Beam Posted
Friday, Oct. 3, 2008, at 5:50 PM ET
Why would someone spend thousands of hours designing & keeping up these websites to offer
free information to others?
I often receive e-mail that asks, "Who are you anyway? Why do you do this? It must take thousands of hours to work on these sites!"
I have to reply - "You're absolutely right! It does take
many, many hours each day to work on these sites. Why do I do it? I use the opportunity to work on these sites to
help others as well as learning for myself - the information that's included in them.
I read every article & implement as much
of the information I take in to benefit my own recovery process. Helping others is so worthwhile
for me. I enjoy working on the computer, receiving e-mail from those trying to help themselves & are stuck, meaning
that they may need help & most of all - you can learn so much more from helping others. I believe that you may learn things you may have never understood
before, if you weren't trying to help someone else with their problem. You look at things from a different perspective &
it forces you to keep your mind sharp, being open & aware of thing at all times.
I can only urge you to take the opportunity to send me an e-mail pertaining to your specific needs & to utilize the underlined link word opportunities - they're really extremely beneficial! I consider each one of them
to be an open door, to understanding
something new & exciting.
Some of you may have heard of the concept that you never know what will
trigger a very important treasure chest of individually important information that's exactly what you needed to find!
It could be talking to a stranger, or sometimes someone very close to you just says something that you're particularly keyed in on. It could be a book, a magazine or a newspaper article...
the odds here are large that something will be of interest to you because of the vast opportunity of information!
Just try to enter the site pages with an open mind, breathing slowly & deeply with your emotional feelings experience to enable
your brain & your thought processes to do their job in helping you to be aware of information that may be useful to you in your recovery from whatever's holding your personal growth back.
kathleen
p.s. as for "who am i?" i'm just someone that is just like
you - searching for answers in recovery of many life dysfunctions & mental illness (post traumatic stress disorder & others) that has made a personal commitment to helping others.
using feature #2:
All emotions
& feelings are in alphabetical order. You will travel through
the underlined link words throughout the emotional feelings network of sites.
This is the index of all the sites
you'll find within the network:
Emotional Feelings: containing all feelings & emotions that
begin with “a”
Emotional Feelings, 3: containing all feelings & emotions beginning with the letter "b" - also new this april 2006 - the feeling of belligerance... it's taking time to find info, but there is some posted - keep an eye out if you're interested
in that feeling in the future for more info!
Emotional Feelings, too: containing all feelings & emotions that begin
with “c - new feature here!!!! & d has moved out of the house, almost completely!” it's moved to this forwarding address....
emotional feelings, 4 which features all emotions & feelings beginning with
the letter, "d" the move
is being done gradually, so please be patient! stop in to see the new site anytime!
another new change
in april '06 at emotional feelings, 4 is the addition of the following emotions & feelings!
I've made lots of changes & additions this
month so please be patient with my progress.... I'm typing as fast as I can!
Feeling Emotional, too: containing all feelings & emotions beginning
with the letters “e & f ”
Feeling Emotional, 4: containing all feelings & emotions beginning
with the letters "g thru i"
Feeling Emotional, 3: containing all feelings & emotions beginning with the letters
"j thru n"
Feeling Emotional: containing all feelings & emotions
beginning with the letters “o thru r”
extremely emotional: containing all feelings
& emotions beginning with the letter "s thru
w" - this site is no longer available. see the notation above!
your "Un"emotional Side: This site highlights all feelings &
emotions using the prefix "un" before them - i.e., unaware, unacceptable, uncontrollable,
unsuccessful....
the layer down under: this site offers more than feelings & emotions! the subjects contained in the layer down under are highlighted in the lefthand
column to give you the feel of some important topics you'll need to consider in feeling
& emotion work as well as general personal growth or recovery processes.
the self pages: containing the topics that are prefixed
with the word, "self" - such as self acceptance, self actualization,
self defeated, self help, self love, etc.
anxieties 101: this site contains information concerning the following topics. you can click on any of the
underlined title words to travel over to that specific page if you see something that you are immediately interested in!
since depression is very often co-existing
with the above anxiety disorders as well as emotions & feelings, eating disorders, abuse & other forms of dysfunction,
there's plenty of information regarding depression & other mood, or affective disorders included.
how it all works: this page is offered because I found the information very important in understanding mental illness & recovery processes,
how your brain works, how your brain is linked to many subjects, etc. as well as a glossary of mental health terms...
the more you
learn about mental illness, the more you begin to realize about how prevalent it is within different
age groups. therefore, i've broken it down into different age levels on each of the following pages...
children & mental illness: topics concerning children & mental illness as well as info concerning the currently being developed site, children 101 (you're here now!!!) - this site can be
accessed while being developed! additional pages linked off of this page: parenting 101
teens & mental illness: different topics concerning teens & mental illness for parents to look over as well as info about the teenscene site!
young adults & mental illness: what concerns young adults directly in relationship with mental health & well being, i.e., college, eating disorders
& other issues
men & mental illness: what concerns men directly with mental health & lifestyle, parenting, job related issues
women & mental illness: what concerns women directly in relationship with mental health, parenting, career & other issues -separate page for
women about hormonal changes & connection with mental illness
seniors & mental illness:what concerns seniors directly in relationship with mental health, life transitions & other issues
lifestyle factors
have a huge link to our mental health. through my research i found that i needed education concerning my lifestyle habits
that had a great bearing on my well being, so i included lifestyle pages on this site as well.
lifestyle diet: it's surprising to learn the ramifications of a nutritious diet in relationship with your mental health
& well being!
lifestyle exercise: a direct connection to mental health! the importance of exercise in your life!
the following is a separate site you may
visit with the emotional feelings network of sites!
night eating: i experienced this eating/sleeping disorder for most of my life
& finally beat it. this website offers information concerning eating & sleeping disorder & pays particular attention
to night eating syndrome!
teenscene: this site is for teens, similar to anxieties101! - & just a quick heads up to your parents with teens! i began to monitor where the people who visit teenscene 101 were coming from & lo & behold !!! - there were lots of hits coming from other sites concerning teens, PORN SITES - and some of them very disgusting to say the least.
so i added
a new, "fake" home page onto teenscene to monitor how many hits i would get on the real homepage, after seeing how many people came to the new "fake" home
page. i put a short sweet little note on there that says, " this is teenscene 101. it's a site for teens who are searching for info concerning teen life. it's not a porn site! but if you were looking for
a porn site - click here - and i sent them to the addictions page at the layer down under that features my thoughts on porn addiction....
sexual predators
are everywhere... make sure your significant other isn't surfing the web for anything that says
"teen" on it & watch where your kids are surfing, because believe it or not, it's one of the newest teen pasttimes!
kathleen!
what can you find here, @ children 101?
Acontinuing resource of mental health info for children only...
....beginning in the womb, it's all explained. the latest info concerning the mental health issues facing children today. you may have been linked to this site from any of
the anxieties 101 network of sites if the subject came up. this site features the most information however, concerning our
little ones. see the navigational menu for the age group you are interested in.
Anxiety Disorders & Depression in Children
from sources such as the National Institute for Mental Health & other very reliable sources
on the internet - each page pays special attention to the mental illnesses that can be experienced by our children.
Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) Attention Deficit Hyperactivity
Disorder, ADHD, is one of the most common mental disorders that develop in children. Children w/ADHD have impaired functioning
in multiple settings, including home, school & in relationships w/peers. If untreated, the disorder can have long-term
adverse effects into adolescence & adulthood.
it's time to get to work on those problems - perhaps counseling
or medication will be used for a treatment plan...
Counseling for Children: descriptions of therapy methods that may be used if your child sees a mental health
professional.
This page includes:
Choosing a Therapist for your
Child's Emotional or Behavioral Problems! (from kidshealth.com - a very thorough article concerning what to look for
& expect from a mental health professional & much more about the topic!)
How prepared
are you to teach your children about what they are feeling & how to deal with the emotions that they experience daily?
A more "in depth" look at how children are affected by their emotions & feelings & how to teach
them the positive coping methods needed to grow up mentally healthy.
This page includes:
Finding a Therapist for your Child's Emotional & Behavioral Problem
(straight from kidshealth.com - one of the best on the web - information in making wise & informed
decisions concerning this very important topic!)
Childhood Abuse & Neglect
are very common
Every
parent needs to be aware of their responsibility of raising their children in a respectful manner.
Along with being aware of your child's well being, being a watchdog for those children who have no caring or responsible parents
or guardian over them - being aware of abuse & neglect in other children is of utmost importance.
This page includes:
Media Article: Many Abused Kids Don't Get Mental Health Services from Medline.com (Reuters News)
Descriptions of Abuse
& Neglect: a comprehensive overview for you to familarize yourself with the facts concerning abuse & neglect with
children, statistics concerning abuse & neglect & more - sources include: Medline.com,
I'm so pleased
that people are visiting the network in record numbers! Hurray! I hope just one thing they find will be an "aha moment" for
each of them!
I moved. Yes,
something I've wanted to do for years finally came to pass and I love it. I've just gotta say that it means a new beginning
for our family as a whole as well as a new beginning for me. Thank God.
With many reasons
for the move, many of them relate to topics within the network, my family's emotions and feelings, needs and my own recovery
personal growth journey. Let me share!
First of
all... the move. The move was something I had always wanted to do, but I went about it the wrong way. Because
of my avoidance behaviors associated with my Post traumatic stress disorder it was easy to do. You can read about this byclicking here.
Now, my job after the move is to incorporate good or productive and
healthy behaviors into the new house and the new beginning. We had to rent 2 dumpsters at the old house to take away all the
trash that was in our house. Still we had to dump some trash at the dump as well. We also have some trash at our new home
that we've been putting out.
Trash - unproductive.
Time To DeClutter?
If you’ve lost sight of your carpet, can’t find your
clean clothes in the pile on the floor, and don’t remember if that basket holds trash or important paperwork, it’s
time to de-clutter.
If you need a hammer and nails but have to wade through old toys, paint cans, and things that have gathered dust
in your garage to find them, it’s time to de-clutter.
Have you given up having family dinners because you’ve lost the dining room table under the accumulated
mess?
Do you shudder when you open your refrigerator because it’s a constant reminder
that you’ve neglected it? Are you afraid when you need something the kids borrowed and you are forced to search through the endless clutter in their rooms to find
your belongings?
Do you have to clean out your seat into an already overloaded trunk just to give a co-worker a ride
home?
People continually add to their daily stress because of the clutter in many, if not all, areas of their
lives.
Then they finally get a day off work only to once more ignore de-cluttering in favor of going shopping,
running errands, or taking the kids somewhere to have fun. So, the clutter continues to build. They may feel they sacrifice
enough of their time already and work too hard to spend their precious off-time decluttering.
Yet this may be the one area that could simplify their busy lives.
Gaining control over clutter can relieve stress. Sometimes a person will attempt to de-clutter their
homes by cleaning and clearing only what can be readily seen by any visitors.
This is similar to the child who shoves everything under the bed or into the closet in an attempt to
fool mom and dad, or at least to get them off their backs temporarily.
People become frustrated every day because they have lost something because of lack of organization.
They have shoved so much junk into lockers, closets, and into their drawers that they feel the situation is hopeless.
Busy families will literally stuff a dresser so full it finally breaks the runners on the drawers,
handles are pulled off from tugging open an overstuffed drawer, and the bottom will give way.
Kids lose athletic clothing, tennis shoes, and socks for lack of organization. Parents lose their ties
or are late to work because their suit was wadded into a pile and wrinkled. They forget to clean their uniforms. They misplace
important papers.
Clutter can affect grades at school, relationships, self-esteem, and careers. Have people
stopped visiting because your home has become so cluttered that it’s unsafe, a germ haven, and smelly - all because
you need to de-clutter?
You can learn to de-clutter. You must reprogram your thinking process and reassess your priorities.
It will help you regain your sense of overall well-being. It’s never too late to learn better habits.
If it's true that we're a product of our environment - and we're neglecting our environment - it's very likely that we're neglecting taking care of our own selves as well!
Declutter My House!
Almost every home has clutter. Clutter is the stuff that finds its way through your home, wandering
from place to place, without a place to belong.
Some clutter just needs to disappear. Other clutter should be organized and a place created for it to belong. But decluttering your
house doesn’t have to be difficult. It depends on how you do it.
There are many ways to declutter your home. I declutter my house by sorting items into three boxes:
keep, give away, and trash. Then, I empty the boxes into the places they belong, and create a home for all of my things. However,
this only works if you know your cluttered home is due to unnecessary items.
Another way to unclutter your house is by going through each room and accessing the clutter
and disorganization. I determine about how much stuff needs to go, and how much stuff needs to stay. If the problem appears to be a lack of places to put things, I head off to the department store
for a brainstorming session.
If you’re not sure where the organization section of your department store is, go to the first
employee you see and ask, “Where is the stuff I can use to declutter my home?” They’ll know right where
to send you.
Once you have a place for everything, it’s time to put everything in its place.
If you start putting things away and realize you still don’t have enough room for everything, you may need to reevaluate what items need to stay, and what items need to go. Some items can go into storage, such as seasonal items.
However, be careful that the next question you ask doesn’t become, “How do I declutter
my basement?”
A friend of mine declutters her home by getting rid of everything in the house that is not being used.
She does this every season. She also avoids bringing anything into the house without making sure that something else leaves.
This is a great way to not only declutter your house, but make sure that everything stays clutter free.
Another way to declutter your home is to get the help of your family.
Don’t try to do it all on your own.
Two weeks before any birthday, Christmas, Easter, or other gift giving holiday, I have my children
go through their toys and box up anything they no longer play with.
This help to keep their room, and the rest of the house, decluttered, as well as making room for the
new toys they will receive as gifts.
The prospect of getting new things always makes them more willing to part with those toys they don’t
really play with anymore.
There are possibly thousands of handy household hints available through self help books, websites,
internet searches, and television shows. Below you will find what I think are some of the best handy household hints out there.
Here’s a handy household hint to ease your dusting chores and help your electronics last longer.
Did you know that you can repel dust from your electronics?
After dusting, use a fabric softener sheet that has already been used in your laundry, and rub it all
over the parts of the electronics that you don’t want to dust. Instead of attracting dust, the electronics will repel
dust!
Did you know that the best thing for decluttering your garden is likely in your kitchen cabinet?
The best weed repellent in your arsenal can be found in the baking section of your local grocery store.
Apple cider vinegar sprayed on any plant will kill it by the next day.
This handy household hint could save your life.
It’s a good idea to go through your medicine cabinet twice a year and throw out any old medications.
This prevents taking a medication by mistake, or children getting into medication that is old and might cause illness.
There are several handy household hints out there for cleaning tough floors.
Use silver polish to clean up crayon marks from vinyl or linoleum floors.
Remove wax from carpets by placing brown paper over the wax, then running over it with a warm iron.
Ivory bar soap works well on almost any carpet stain. Just use the soap with a toothbrush and rinse
well.
There are also a lot of handy household hints uttering up your windows and mirrors? Here’s a
handy household hint that will save you money. Instead of buying window cleaner, buy rubbing alcohol and put it in a spray
bottle. It won’t leave streaks and it will actually repel prints for a few days.
There are many other handy household hints available in a variety of places. The best way to find more
household hints might be to search the Internet, or try a household hint and organization book.
Spring is in the air, and spring cleaning is all about getting rid of clutter! It is, after all, the
first step to home organization. But how do you declutter your home? By following this simple, three step process in every
room of your home.
You will need three boxes (large ones if you have a lot of clutter), a trash bag, an egg timer, a permanent marker, and a lot of self control.
Mark one box “Keep,” one box “Give Away,” and one box “Trash.”
Line the trash box with a trash bag. Set your egg timer for one hour, and go!
Start with the door way to the room, and work clockwise.
Anything you are going to keep goes in the keep box. Anything you are going to give away
goes in the give away box. Anything that needs to be tossed goes in the trash box.
Don’t second guess yourself.
Go with your first instinct. Your goal is to be done with this room in one hour! Don’t dawdle!
When you are finished with the room, or your timer goes off, it’s time to take care of your boxes.
Dispose of the trash.
Take the give away box immediately to your car and put it in the trunk to take to your
favorite charity or thrift store. (This way you can’t change your mind about keeping any of it!)
Then, it’s time to take care of the Keep box. Take the Keep box around your home depositing items
in the room they belong, putting them in their place.
If it is a room you haven’t decluttered yet, place the item in the room where it will be out
of the way until you have a place for it. By the time you are finished decluttering your home you will have a place for everything,
I promise!
If your timer hasn’t gone off yet, you did a great job!
If it has, reset it for fifteen minutes. Kick back and relax, and glory in what you have accomplished!
When the timer goes off a second time, it’s time to get back to work by moving on to the next room or finishing the
one you started.
Depending on the amount of clutter in your home and the size of your home, it may take several days
or a week of this process to declutter your home.
However, it will happen, and when you are finished you will have a clean, organized home with a place
for everything and everything in its place.
This is the first
part of my latest journey. I don't want to put down too many things at once - so I'll keep the above information for the month
of June. It's a great time for garage sales and donating to Goodwill and other charitable
organizations. Contact a domestic violence shelter in your area to see what they could use for women starting their lives
over!
Get outside and
enjoy the spring/summer weather! It's so awesome to commune with nature!
As always, I'm
thinking of all of you and hoping that these websites are helping you in some way!
Visit the website "werenotafraid.com" & hopefully you'll be able to view some of the pictures...
the response was so overwhelming that the site is using more
than the allotted bandwith obviously as you can't access the galleries any time you visit, you just have to be patient!
emotional feelings network of sites
would like to join in on the statement being made by the populations worldwide & offers an oppotunity for you to make
your own - we're not afraid - picture & send them in here at emotional feelings to replace the pics that are already in
place all over the site! just send them to:
ps. read more about the website & see one of the pics
submitted to the website by visiting the "afraid page" just click !!!
the following web links are provided
for your convenience in visiting the source sites of the information displayed on this page:
Click here to visit the Red Cross page that allows you to access your local
chapter of the Red Cross by entering your zip code in the specified box, to see how you can help in your area. You can also
call your local Red Cross Chapter that you can find the number for online or in your local phone book to volunteer for any openings that may need to be filled or you can find another way to help others there
as well!
you've been visiting children
101
please have a great day & take a few minutes
to explore some of the other sites in the emotional feelings network of sites! explore the unresolved emotions & feelings that may be the cause of some of your pain & hurt...
be curious & open to new possibilities! thanks again for visiting at anxieties 102!
almost 30 sites, all designed, editted & maintained by kathleen!
until next time: consider
yourself hugged by a friend today!
til' next time! kathleen
**disclaimer**
this is simply an
informational website concerning emotions & feelings. it does not advise anyone to perform methods -treatments -
practice described within, endorse methods described anywhere within or advise any visitor with medical or psychological
treatment that should be considered only thru a medical doctor, medical professional, or mental health professional.
in no way are we a medical professional or mental health professional.
